Government Shutdown Smackdown

So I was reading a more liberal blog post just now, and it was this:

So, Imagine that the company you work for held a poll, and asked everyone if they thought it would be a good idea to put a soda machine in the break room. The poll came back, and the majority of your colleagues said “Yes”, indicating that they would like a soda machine. Some said no, but the majority said yes. So, a week later, there’s a soda machine.

Now imagine that Bill in accounting voted against the soda machine. He has a strong hatred for caffeinated soft drinks, thinks they are bad you you, whatever. He campaigns throughout the office to get the machine removed. Well, management decides “OK, we’ll ask again” and again, the majority of people say “Yes, lets keep the soda machine.”

Bill continues to campaign, and management continues to ask the employees, and every time, the answer is in favor of the soda machine. This happens, lets say… 35 times. Eventually, Bill says “OK, I’M NOT PROCESSING PAYROLL ANYMORE UNTIL THE SODA MACHINE IS REMOVED”, so nobody will get paid unless management removes the machine.

What should we do???

Answer: Fire Bill and get someone who will do the f***ing job.

Bonus: Bill tells everyone that he was willing to “Negotiate”, to come to a solution where everyone got their payroll checks, but only so long as that negotiation capitulated to his demand to remove the soda machine.

Bill is a f***ing jackass

So then I looked and found that there was an up-voted comment first in line with the most likes that said this:

Ok, let’s expand on this example just a little more to make it more “real life,” shall we?

First off, Bill’s office has a group people that were elected by the workers to make decisions for bettering employee’s morale and overall happiness at work. One day, that group decides the office needs a soda machine. There was no vote in the office, just a vote in the morale group, and they bring in the machine. Upon doing this, they also decide that if there’s a soda machine that EVERYBODY in the office needs to have a soda. Everyday. Whether they need it or not. Everyone must have a soda. On top of that, they wont tell the employees what kinds of soda are in the machine until it arrives, or how much it will cost. The group decides, and the soda machine arrives.

Now Bill is just an employee. He drinks soda occasionally, and likes a certain brand because he knows it’s good, but he doesn’t drink it everyday because that’s expensive. When Bill finds out that soda is now mandatory at work he gets outraged and petitions to remove the soda machine, because Bill doesn’t have the budget to buy a soda everyday. The morale group campaigns that everyone needs soda, and manages to even convince people that don’t drink soda that they need to. Now more people that don’t drink soda are becoming aware of the rule and try to opt out. “You can bring in your own soda,” they are told, “to keep from buying a soda from the soda machine every day. If you don’t bring a soda, and don’t buy your own soda from our machine, you’ll still be docked the cost of a soda per day from your pay. It’s only fair to everyone.” When the machine arrives, they finally disclose that the sodas cost employees $2.50 each, but you can’t see what soda you get when you push a button. It’s just random luck that you’ll get what you want. On top of that, they secretly neglect to tell people that the best price they could get on soda was $4 a can, but they sell them at $2.50 because they believe everyone can afford that, regardless of if they can.

Bill is in accounting and knows math, and he will not stand for people having money deducted from their paychecks that are not actually drinking or bringing soda. He also recognizes that the company’s money is being spent frivolously and the cost is far more than the return. It will eventually bankrupt the company. After numerous petitions to have the machine removed, he finally stops processing payroll, and will not resume until the machine is removed. The morale group will not budge, and refuses to remove the machine, or change any rules surrounding it. The company is at a standstill, and must close down until the issue is resolved.

Bill isn’t such a jackass now, is he?

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is the difference between the two warring sides of this argument: one chooses to ignore everything except for face-value political tripe, and the other is attempting to force the American people to see the horror that is really going on.

2 thoughts on “Government Shutdown Smackdown”

  1. May I share another way of looking at the issue?

    Suppose I do not want to pay for my health care.
    My view is that if I get sick I can go to the hospital and they have to treat me.
    The hospital does treat me. But of course the cost must be covered someway, so the hospital charges those who do pay for heath care an additional amount to cover the cost for treating me.

    It’s a good deal for me. But not so good for those who are paying for my treatment!

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